If you’re a first-time mom, the “Terrible Twos” might sound like an urban legend until your toddler throws their first full-blown tantrum in the middle of a mall. From sudden screaming fits to defiant “no’s” at every turn, this developmental phase can leave even the calmest parent frazzled. The good news? Pediatricians at Makati Medical Center (MakatiMed) reassure moms that these meltdowns are completely normal and manageable.
Understanding the Terrible Twos
According to Dr. Bernadette C. Benitez, a pediatrician at MakatiMed, the Terrible Twos typically affect children between 18 to 30 months old. At this stage, toddlers are learning to walk, climb, and speak in short sentences. More importantly, they’re beginning to recognize emotions, test limits, and assert independence.
“Your child’s nervous system is still developing,” explains Dr. Benitez. “This means they struggle to regulate their big emotions, so a meltdown is just their way of communicating frustration.”
Staying Calm During a Tantrum
The first step for any mom facing a toddler outburst? Breathe and stay calm. Dr. Benitez emphasizes that tantrums are not a reflection of bad parenting, they’re simply age-appropriate behavior.
If your toddler flips out in a public place, gently move them to a quieter spot. Getting down to their eye level, speaking softly but firmly, and offering physical comfort like holding their hand or letting them sit on your lap can help soothe them.
Handling Meltdowns at Home
Different situations call for different strategies:
After a “No”: Ignore the tantrum without giving in. This teaches your toddler that outbursts don’t get results and encourages self-regulation.
Refusing tasks: Instead of yes-or-no questions, give choices: “Do you want to brush your teeth first or put on pajamas first?” Guiding toddlers to make decisions helps them express their wants constructively.
Aggressive behavior: If your toddler hits or kicks, calmly separate them from the other child, comfort the hurt child, and explain that hurting others has consequences.
Repeated tantrums: Time-outs can help toddlers regain control of their emotions while reinforcing the boundaries.
Moms Can Have Tantrums Too
Dr. Benitez reminds moms that losing your temper occasionally is natural. What matters is how you recover. Apologizing to your child and modeling accountability teaches them emotional regulation as well.
Navigating the Terrible Twos is challenging, but it’s also a phase that passes. Stay patient, keep strategies consistent, and remember that these moments are milestones in your toddler’s growth. For Filipino moms juggling busy lives, having a few go-to coping strategies can make all the difference.