My Word of the Year: Healing

I am not into New Year's Resolution because I don't wait for the first day of the year to make some changes in my life. Instead, I choose a word that will help me become a better person. When I started Forty and Beyond, I picked fitness. Last year's word was focus.

Why I chose healing for 2019

A book that has made an impact in my life is Mitch Albom's "The Five People You Meet in Heaven".  When I learned about the sequel "The Next Person You Meet in Heaven", I started googling quotes from the book while waiting for its availability in the bookstore. I chanced upon these lines:

"... because we embrace our scars more than our healing, we can recall the exact day we got hurt. But who remembers the day the wound was gone?"

I knew right away that my word for 2019 is healing. 

2007 was the worst year of my life. I was betrayed and was left feeling empty. I was never the same person since then. I started believing that every person I know will eventually hurt me. And those who have hurt me are capable of hurting me again.

I'm still struggling. 

I'm so preoccupied with nursing a perceived hurt I have not noticed that the genuine hurt was already gone. 

12 years of dwelling. 

This morning, I was decluttering and organizing my stuff. I opened the book "Yesterday I Cried" and read this dedication

I don't cry anymore or feel a stab of pain whenever I remember what happened in 2007. But there are times I still feel angry with the people who had caused me pain. Lately, It's my parents death that makes the tears rolling. A different kind of pain that I have to get used to.

I want to heal.
I need to heal.

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  1. Praying for you Ms.Roselle na tuluyan ng mawala ang nararamdaman mo po. Paminsan po mas ok din talaga na meron kayong nakakausap about sa nararamdaman nyo para kahit papaano ay maibsan man lang ung pain.
    Word of the year ko naman po peace .